Have you noticed that the more exclamation marks someone uses, the more they appear to be writing directly from the Loony Bin? This proposal, apparently from a very excited individual, came in my email yesterday.
I was wondering if you were available tonight? I love watching a woman smoke! It really turns me on! I am very serious about seeing you! You look SO hot in your eros-miami ad!! Are you still available tonight? Again, I am very, very, very serious about seeing you TONIGHT!!!
Do you smoke in real life? If so, what brand? If you don't mind, could you show up smoking Virginia Slims 120's when you come to see me? That is a major fantasy for me!
I want to have a really good time! I will be back in Miami about every 3-4 weeks and I would love to have someone like you that I could see while I am here!
I have tried to find someone, but no-one is willing to do what I want...so...here's what I want to do! Could you meet me at the CVS on 88th Street in Kendall (I'll give you the address and directions if you are sure you want to see me)...dress very HOT and SEXY (really high heels and a very sexy dress)...and then follow me back to my hotel after we have gone shopping!
Here's what I can offer you!!!! I can pay you $450 cash...give you a $700 laptop...and take you on a shopping spree at CVS (you can buy mp3 player, tv, or whatever you want up to $300) and then back at my hotel you order champagne, beer and etc. from Room Service ($100).
Are you interested? If so, I will give you my phone number and we can hook up tonight!!!
Damn, it's tempting. A girl could score a lot of Crest on a gig like that.