Tricks and treats...

Dear Tabu:

Have you ever been caught in an embarrassing situation with a client?

Curious

Dear Curious:

What a coincidence that you would ask me that (ahem!) I was just reminiscing about one of the most ridiculous and memorable evenings I've spent as Tabu.

On a long-awaited overnight with a regular, my client showed up pale and holding his groin gingerly. When I asked what was wrong, he unzipped his pants to reveal a wad of bloody Kleenex in his briefs. He'd nicked himself shaving his balls, and the poor guy just wouldn't stop bleeding.

After the frenzy to find antiseptic, bandages, etc in my incall, we were both flustered and decided to go back to his hotel to get him into fresh underwear.

It wasn't until midnight, after a recuperative dinner and drinks, that we got ready for action... and realized that we had left the condoms and lube back at my incall.... 25 minutes away.

Bloody hell, as they say. But since we both had forgotten the vitals, there was plenty of blame to spread around. And we decided that spreading something else would be much more stress-relieving.

My southern suitor called every store in the neighborhood to find a 24-hour Walgreens... and then cabbed it over there and back to get us supplied.

It just goes to show, some nights you're tricked, some you're treated... and sometimes you miraculously achieve both. One thing's for sure: it beats real life!